


Feeling Small

by LSwan



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Abandonment, Age Play Little Emma Swan, Diapers, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Little Space, Loneliness, Mommy Kink, Non-Sexual Age Play, Nursing Kink, mdlg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:07:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27515044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LSwan/pseuds/LSwan
Summary: Please read the tags if you don't like this type of fanfic then please don't read thank youRegina and Emma have formed a strong connection, with one of them always knowing when the other needs them. Partially, Regina, she knew the signs to watch out for when Emma was having a hard time and would do about anything to help her.
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan
Comments: 25
Kudos: 139





	1. Discovery

Regina knew upon entering the house that something didn't feel right. Deep down, she could feel the strong connection to her partner and knew tonight would be one of those nights. Emma would need her differently from any other night. 

It has been three years since they both discover they had feelings for each other and could no longer hide their true feelings. Regina didn't regret any of it. Finally, her happy ending seemed reachable as her partner would always tell her it's not an ending; it’s a beginning. 

Heading up the stairs, Regina listened for any noise to indicate her partner was home. After a few short seconds, she could hear the distinctive crying coming from their bedroom.

Regina pushed the door enough to see where Emma was without being noticed.

Seeing Emma curled up quietly sobbing to herself, clutching her much loved baby blanket. Regina silently pushed the door open, making slow movements towards the bed. She knew seeing the blanket indicated she was going to be needed more than usual tonight. 

It hadn’t made an appearance in a while, kept locked away in a special box inside their shared wardrobe. With Emma using the blanket infrequently, Regina knew to be more cautious and watch for other signs that her partner needed special attention. 

She was careful not to startle her when she was in this state, having learned from past experiences. 

Gently sitting on the edge of the bed, Regina began humming a soft tune letting Emma know she was there while allowing her to seek comfort. It wasn't long before she felt Emma move closer to her until her head was lying on her lap. Smiling down and looking into her eyes, she could see the distant faraway look. 

"Hi, sweet girl," she whispered before returning to humming and running her fingers through Emma's blonde curls, waiting for her to calm down enough to be aware of her surroundings. It didn’t take long till Emma had fully moved into reginas arm’s curled up on her lap. Regina began rocking her gently, knowing this was emmas safe space. 

Moving just a little bit to lean against the headboard for more support, she heard Emma let out a small whimper pulling her closer and gently rocking her once again whilst rubbing her hand up and down Emma's back “shh, it’s ok. I’m right here with you. You’re safe.” she felt Emma begin to relax while still clinging to her for comfort. 

Regina knew how hard it was for Emma to let go and allow herself to be taking care of, Afraid she would feel the same rejection she had experienced growing up. Regina was patient, knowing to remain calm as not to overwhelm or scare her, waiting for Emma to calm down and trust her needs would be taken care of. 

Regina discovered this part of Emma one night during their second year living together. She had done so well in hiding it that when Regina found her clutching her baby blanket, sucking her thumb, and listening to lullabies playing on her nightlight, she had kept hidden. Emma broke down and hid away from Regina for a few days, embarrassed and scared of being judged and rejected. Emma was preparing to run, which she used to do when things got too much, but Regina not once considered abandoning her and instead helped her embrace who she needed to be to begin to heal.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to say a big thank you for all the kudos and bookmarks they have helped me stay motivated to continue. this chapter is again short and I would be grateful for some feedback and help 
> 
> happy reading

Emma’s day hadn’t gone as she was hoping it would. The feelings she had been having for the last few months weren’t going to go away this time, the little voice in her head calling out for attention, wanting things Emma shouldn’t want and putting negative thoughts in her head. Emma tried hard not to believe them and ignore the voice, but she couldn't help but feel anxious at everything around her. 

Emma had been in that place before; she was too scared to go there again. She knew Regina was there the first time and a few times after when she slipped. The fear of rejection and judgment was still as intense as the first time she slipped, making it harder for her just to let go, and this time she had a feeling she would be alone. 

_**Earlier that morning** _

Emma woke to a glimmer of light coming from a small gap in the curtain. She tried hard to fall back to sleep before her morning alarm would go off but was unsuccessful, finding herself focusing on a little spot of her ceiling, dreading what the day would bring. Feeling the space beside her, Emma knew it would be another day of being alone. At this thought, silent tears run down her face. Slowly wiping them away, she sat up, gradually working up enough energy to get out of bed. She now had responsibilities and couldn’t just stay in bed like she would have done when she felt like this back in Boston. Thinking of Boston just made her mood even worse. She couldn't bring herself out of this mindset and knew the day would only get worse if she didn't pull herself together.

Getting ready and having breakfast had taken longer than usual. Regina had left for work early, which she had been doing for the last few weeks now, meaning they didn't get to spend as much time together. It added anxiety to Emma’s already anxious mind. Was Regina sick of her? Did she not love her anymore? Emma knew she shouldn't be thinking like that, but the voice in her head was always there and wasn't showing any signs of going away, no matter how much she ignored it.

Grabbing her keys, she locked up and decided to take a slow walk into work. Maybe a walk would help clear her mind a bit. There was a slight chill in the air for the time of year it was. She rubbed her hands together and wrapped her arms around herself, giving herself a hug to try to keep warm. There weren't many people out and about, which made her feel just a little bit more lonely. She couldn't remember the last time she had physical contact with another human. Regina had grown distant in recent weeks. It felt like she was avoiding Emma at every possible opportunity. Her thoughts then turned to Henry, who she hardly saw anymore after he decided to see more of the world, leaving storybrooke with his girlfriend violet. They had been away for a few months planning on returning in a few weeks before more traveling. Emma was soon pulled from her thoughts by the noise of her phone ringing. Seeing the caller ID, she hesitant for a minute before answering. 

“Hi mum, is everything ok.”

“Can you make it to the loft after your shift today? We have something important we would like to discuss with you.”

Starting to feel a little bit more on edge, Emma had a feeling something was wrong.  
“Yes, I should be able to make it over, Regina is working all day, so I will head straight over once my shift has finished.” ending the conversation, Emma felt a sudden urge to be sick, holding it in; she managed to get to the station. 

Sitting at her desk all day alone trying to complete all the paperwork from the last week was hard enough without the constant sound of the clock ticking away in the corner Still, all Emma could think about was the conversation she had with her mother on the phone. 

Emma feared the conversation her mother wanted to have. Did she find out what happened a few months back with Regina? Did snow want her to leave Storybrooke? Had she upset her parents without knowing? Did they know something she didn’t? Has Regina said something? Emma panicked at the unknown and knew she needed to find a distraction before things become more uncontrollable. 

Finally managing to complete some paperwork for the day, Emma packed her stuff up, locked the station, still working to stay in control of her emotions enough to make it to snow and David’s apartment. 

The chill was still in the air as she made her way to snow and Davids's apartment. She quicked her pace, not wanting to let her mind wondered further down an unwanted track. 

Taking a deep breath, trying to release some of her anxiety, she knocked on the door of the loft.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the Kudos. It means a lot. I know I'm not the best writer and would appreciate any help and recommendations to improve. 
> 
> Another short chapter I do hope in the future, I manage to write longer ones, still looking for a beta.

_Taking a deep breath, trying to release some of her anxiety, she knocked on the door. ___

__Emma could feel herself becoming more anxious as a few seconds went by. Hearing their voices and footsteps coming towards the door, Emma prepared herself as much as she could without knowing what she needed to prepare for; her hands were shaking; was she about to face one of her biggest fears and be rejected by her parents?_ _

__David was the one who opened the door and immediately noticed the look of fear on his daughter’s face. He knew his wife ringing Emma earlier and telling her the news this way was a bad idea. Knowing his daughter as he did, he could sense this wasn’t going to be news she wanted to hear, and the reaction Mary-Margaret was hoping for wasn’t going to happen._ _

__Before David even had a chance to let Emma in the door and ask if she was ok, mary Margaret had managed to squeeze past him and pull Emma into a hug. Seeing Emma flinch and try to take a step back confirmed his suspicions. His wife seemed to miss the signs, excited to tell Emma their news._ _

__“Oh, Emma, I’m so glad you were able to come over. Your dad and I would like to give you some important news.”_ _

__Emma took a step back out of her mother’s arms, trying to avoid eye contact, walking past her mother into the loft, giving David a quick uneasy smile as he followed her to the sofa. She wanted this to be quick. Emma couldn’t wait any longer than was necessary after the quick hug with her mother. She had a feeling she knew what they were about to tell her, hoping she was wrong. Emma took a deep breath and looked towards her mother._ _

__“What’s so important you needed me to come over to tell me.?”_ _

__Mary Margaret had started to realize Emma seemed distant and was beginning to think this was a bad idea but knew she had to tell her before she found out from someone else. Taking a few steps towards Emma, hoping she wouldn’t back away, she looked into her eyes. She could see the fear and tried her best to ease it._ _

__“Why don’t we sit down? I have made us all some hot chocolate just the way you like it. Would you like me to bring some over for you?”_ _

__“Thanks, mom, but I don’t want to stay long; it’s getting late, and I haven’t been home yet and would like to spend some time with Regina if I can as she’s been working a lot.”_ _

“Yes, of course, I understand.” Sitting beside Emma, she leaned forward a pulled out a small silver box with a bow wrapped around it from the small table, passing it carefully over to Emma; she smiled

“I wanted to give you a little something before we tell you the news we have.”

Emma cautiously took the little box from Mary-Margaret. Hands still slightly shaking, she began slowly taking off the little silver bow. Trying to keep her hands steady, she fumbled with the lid of the box, carefully lifting it off. The item inside the box caused her heart to drop. She knew this day was coming. Trying to stop the tears that were starting to blur her vision and not wanting to hear what her parents were going to say, Emma ran. Mary-Margaret heard the sound of the box hitting the floor and the door slamming shut before she had time to react to Emma's sudden departure.

Emma ran until she was finally home. Thinking about the mansion being her home caused more tears to fall. Managing to make her way inside and to her room, Emma collapsed on the bed.

Curling into herself in the middle of the bed, Emma ignored the little voice in her head, screaming to be let out. Emma knew she couldn't give in that easy there were too many thoughts and feelings going through her mind. Trying to block it all out, shd squeezed her eyes closed, willing to be taken away to the safe space she had created in her mind. Summoning her baby blanket, Emma held it tight, trying hard to cling to the little comfort she thought she had but thinking of her blanket being her only source of comfort cut deeper than she thought. Emma's breathing became shallow. The sudden feeling of drowning overwhelmed her; She tried her best to fight the negative thoughts wishing she had her mama to help make the bad feelings go away.

Why did no one love her?

She hadn’t noticed Regina was in the room with her until she heard the soft humming. Emma knew then that maybe things weren’t going to be as bad. She had someone to help her through this. She wasn’t alone.


	4. Chapter 4

_She hadn’t noticed Regina was in the room with her until she heard the soft humming. Emma knew then that maybe things weren’t going to be as bad; she had someone to help her through this. She wasn’t alone._

Starting to feel herself calm just enough to seek comfort, she slowly moved towards the edge of the bed, gently laying her head across mama’s lap, hoping that now she was here, mama would help all the bad feelings go away. 

It took a while for Emma to relax enough to fully let go and trust her mama to take care of her. She wasn't sure when her big thoughts disappeared, but they were slowly being replaced with feelings she wasn't sure how to express. All Emma could do was cry harder and cling to her mama. Looking up into her eyes, Emma melted more into her embrace, curling in close when she heard the soft, caring voice and steady heartbeat of her own personal savior saving her when things became too much. 

Feeling herself being moved, Emma instantly panicked. She didn't want her mama to leave. She hadn't realized she had even made any noise until she heard the soft, comforting voice in her ear. “shh, it’s ok. I’m right here with you. You’re safe.” Emma’s fears slightly started to ease with those words, and she relaxed more into the comfort she was receiving. 

It didn't take long before Emma fell asleep, curled up in Regina’s arm. Regina, not wanting her waking up alone and scared, stayed holding Emma close to her, gently rocking back and forth, continuing to run her fingers through Emma’s blonde curls, trying to give as much comfort as she could while she slept. 

Sitting watching how peaceful Emma looked while asleep, Regina thought about what could have possibly triggered Emma to slip. She would have usually noticed if something had upset Emma or noticed a change in her normal behavior. Still, Regina was coming up blank how could she have missed this? She thought ringing Mary-Margret might help. Maybe she would know if something happened today before she had the chance to reach for her phone, she felt movement in her arms. Looking down, the sight of beautiful green eyes greeted her.  
Moving some hair out of Emma's face and placing a little kiss on her forehead. Regina calmly whispered, “Did you have a nice nap?” 

Emma’s eyes seem to look around the room as if searching for something or someone yet unable to see, still holding their distant look. Emma wasn't in the right headspace to give Regina a verbal response. 

Pulling Emma closer to her chest, Regina carefully maneuvered them both to the edge of the bed, all the while humming to keep Emma calm. With the help of magic, Regina was able to carry Emma over to the rocking chair she had kept from when Henry was little. 

“Everythings ok now mummy’s going to take care of you and make it all better. I’ll stay by your side always.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the new comments and kudos its kept me motivated to write more. It's taken me longer, as I did struggle for a while. I hope you like this new chapter.

Gently rocking in the chair, Regina couldn't stop the guilt she was starting to feel creeping up on her. She needed to get her own emotions in control if she was to be the person Emma needed her to be right now. 

Checking in on Emma, who was once again fast asleep in her arms, she shifted slightly to a more comfortable position, grabbing her phone from the side table next to her. She decided now might be the best time to call mary-Margaret and find out if she had seen Emma earlier that morning. 

Giving Emma a quick kiss on her forehead, Regina waited a few seconds for Mary-Margaret to answer the call.

(phone call between Mary-Margaret and Regina)

Hearing the beep indicating somebody had answered the call, Regina could not even say a quick hello before mary Margaret began to speak.

“Regina, I was not expecting a call from you. Is everything ok with henry?”

“Hello, Mary-Margaret, Henry is ok. This morning, he called to let me know of his plans to return to Storybrooke with violet, although I’m not calling about Henry. I’m calling regarding the daughter you seem to have forgotten you have.”

Catching Mary-Margaret off guard, Regina could hear her stuttering to herself on the other side. After a few moments, she composed herself. 

“I’m sorry. Is Emma ok? I just assumed you were calling about henry. I saw Emma this morning, and she mentioned you were working late, so I didn’t expect you would have seen her.” Regina could hear the slight panic in her voice, leading her to believe Mary-Margaret knew something. 

“I was due to be working late. Instead, I left early to support your very emotional daughter, who has just cried herself to sleep in my arms. She hasn’t told me what’s got her upset. However, I have an idea you may know something. especially since you have just confirmed my thoughts that she saw you earlier this morning.” Regina hoped she hadn’t just made things worse for Emma, revealing the state she was in, but she knew it was the only way to get Mary-Margaret to talk.

“She did seem a little distant when she got here this morning. I rang her to ask if she could come over as we had something we wanted to inform her about and discuss as a family. Regina, if I knew she was as upset as you say she is, I would have informed you of the situation as soon as she left the loft.”

“What happened? You are not pregnant, are you? Because you know how sensitive that subject is with Emma, and right now, that’s the only thing I can think of that you would need to talk to her about to make her this emotional.” Regina worked hard to keep her emotions in check, not wanting Mary-Margaret to shut down and refuse to tell her. 

“I would feel better speaking to you in person and checking on Emma if that’s possible. I would have followed her this morning had I known I had upset her.” Mary-Margaret sounded defeated and heartbroken as she admitted to upsetting her daughter. 

Regina continued to speak with Mary-Margaret for a little while longer before ending the call. 

Sighing a bit too loudly at what news snow had revealed, she felt a tear begin to roll down her cheek; swiping it away with her thumb, she looked down at the now peaceful girl in her arms, hoping she hadn’t disturbed her sleep. 

Regina had worked out part of the reason why Emma could be this upset. Still, the feeling of guilt was playing in the back of her head. How had she not realized Emma was becoming overwhelmed. 

Once again lost in thought, Regina was pulled back to reality when she felt Emma stirring in her arms. She knew partly now why Emma was having a hard time and hoped this new information might help her care for Emma how she needed to. Even if it only helped a little bit, it was better than trying to work out what was wrong when Emma wasn't in the right headspace to tell her. 

Lifting Emma into a sitting position facing her on her knee, she softly ran her fingers across her cheek, silently checking in with her.

Emma's face was red and puffy from being so upset. Sniffling, Emma leaned forward, settling her head onto her mama’s chest, hearing the steady heartbeat of her mama.

Regina stayed silent, letting Emma have a quiet moment to herself, not stopping her gentle hand movements through Emma's hair, a sign that she was still there.

Emma started to feel herself calming down and gaining back some control, enough to put her thumb in her mouth a giving it a gentle suck before snuggling closer to her mama, letting out a sigh of relief in the process. 

It didn’t take long before they both heard a growl from Emma’s tummy.

Feeling the movement of her mama’s shoulders moving and hearing the gentle chuckle, Emma peaked up to see her mama smiling down at her. 

“What do you say about getting some food in that rumbly tummy of yours, eh?” Regina asked Emma as she began tickling her tummy. 

Emma relaxed further, loving the fun and caring side of her mama, laughing as Regina tickled her before nodding her head at being asked a question, not yet ready to use her words. 

“All right. First, let's get you changed into something comfy, then we can have some yummy food, and maybe after snuggle and watch a movie, would you like that?”

Emma tensed up at being asked the question and pushed herself further into her mama. Being changed into something comfy sounded like something good, but Emma was nervous about the full meaning. Regina sensed this. Lifting emmas chin slightly to give eye contact, she smiled, 

“ why don’t you go find something comfy I can help you get ready if you would like me to, but we will go at your pace if you aren’t comfortable with something, you tell me, ok, I won’t make you do anything you aren’t ready for.”

Emma's tension began to ease as she Snuggling back into her mama. Finding her voice, she looked up at her mama.

“Mama, help?.”


End file.
